Friday, September 30, 2011

Brand New Baby from about 5 years ago

As those of you following us here know, John had some pretty good news pretty late last night. 

Since he's a little pre-occupied and not ready to share how all of that went down, I thought I'd start a share an email my good friend Karl sent out when my 5-year-old was born.

Dateline 4/13/06

According to reports that are coming in off the AP Wire, we are getting word that Jamie and Becca are the proud new parents of a healthy, happy, baby Boy.

Here is what we have been able to piece together at this time.

St.Peters, MO 4/12/06
Sometime around 6:30pm, Becca began feeling discomfort stemming from being 9 months pregnant.  This discomfort worried Jamie to the point he began sweating profusely and we believe may have rendered himself dehydrated.  Becca's pains continued for what seemed like days, but was really only 2 1/2 hours.  At that time, Jaime thought it would be best if a Medical Professional look into this pain as Oswald, as we all know is only qualified as an "Email Shooter" and not a Mid-Wife.

St. Louis, MO
Around 9pm (reports are still sketchy) the family of two arrived at ST. LUKES HOSPITAL.  There it was confirmed that Becca was indeed pregnant and that the Baby was no longer happy with the living arrangements made between son and mother and their living arrangements over the past 9 months.  Doctors being of sound mind decided to admit Becca to see if they couldn't come to some agreement through arbitration, or if that failed, actual labor.

Somewhere Indiana - 9pm ish 4/12/06
At the very same time that Becca was admitted to ST LUKES, Oswald's parents were beginning their hellish drive from Canton, OH to St. Peters, MO for the arrival of their first grandchild.  As the baby was not due until tomorrow (4/13) Dan and Georgia decided to be safe, call it a night and get a hotel room in Indiana.  It is at this point that his parents used a telephone to call and advise their son of their plans.  Panic set back in as Jamie alerted them to the progress that Becca was making and if they wanted to be present for the birth, they were to demand the money back, get back in to the car and drive, drive like the wind to be present for the birth of their grandson.

Back in St. Louis 4/12/06 - 10pm ish
Becca now feeling better due to the epidural that had recently been injected into her spinal cord was influenced by medical professionals not to push until Midnight.  If she could hold off until then, this nuclear family could get an extra day in the hospital.  Knowing how good hospital cuisine can be, all agreed and Jamie found himself watching South Park and Seinfield episodes from a very uncomfortable chair in a very bright room.

As midnight approached, Becca was told to begin pushing.  Jamie was warned only once that it was only she that needed to push.  She pushed for what we believe to be 6 cycles and after about a half hour of this, Jamie and Becca welcomed for the first time their new son - Lucas Dan Oswald at exactly 12:27am 4/13/06.

While this miracle of life was happening in a closed, secure delivery room.  Dan (a.k.a. Grandpa) was able to out run both Illinois and Missouri State Police and arrived at the hospital exactly 10 minutes before the birth.  While charges of speeding, evading arrest, and failure to use a turn signal are still pending, both Grandma and Grandpa made it to the hospital in the nick of time.

Tale of the Tape:
Lucas Dan Oswald
7lbs 10oz / 20" inches in length
He can read at a 4th grade level and thinks Harry Potter is a wus
Expected Left hander with a penchant for the knuckle ball

Everyone, including Jamie has 10 fingers, 10 toes and is resting and doing well.  Please join me in welcoming the newest addition to our extended family Lucas Dan.

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