Wednesday, August 26, 2015

Finding the Perfect Razor: Dollar Shave Club's Blades are Freakin' Great

This post submitted by Jamie Oswald.

Here at our little Suburban Father Alliance we take our shaving (or lack thereof) seriously. We've already reviewed for you two mail-order blade options (Harry's and the tastefully-named Dorco) and our final review here is for Dollar Shave Club.

I've actually been a Dollar Shave Club member for a while and I'll never go back to buying blades in the store. The 4X "Lover's Blade" is $6/month for 4 blades and is absolutely as good as the Schick or Gillette comparable. I don't typically shave a whole lot of my face, so after my first monthly shipment years ago I quit the club. Those first 4 blades lasted me well over a year. Seriously. They hold up. Just bought my second pack, and they are as good as I remember.

Go buy some. Right now. Preferably from this link.

What I really want to talk to you about are their One-Wipe Charlie's which are - to put it delicately - butt wipes for grown men. I've never bought them, never tried them, and am fundamentally opposed to their use. Why?

To be clear I'm not going to sit here and pretend that I've never been in a situation where something like that would have been useful. We've all gotten in over our heads at one point or another and I'm man enough to tell you that I'm no different. So while I could certainly have used them before and no doubt would have opportunities in the future, I still don't want my sons growing up in a world where men using baby wipes is the norm. My oppositions run in two major directions.

  • How do you carry them around? Is this the whole reason European manbags became popular. Between an iPhone that keeps getting bigger and a wallet that keeps getting thinner -- not to mention a handkerchief and pocket knife because I'm old school -- I've already got enough stuff floating around in my pockets. I cannot fit a tub of wipes in my pocket. And I'm not carrying a murse
  • What happens when you run out? The last thing we need is large swathes of men who have become reliant on these things. What happens when their pockets or backpacks or fanny packs or whatever run out? I fear for a world where people are chasing the pre-moistened dragon, knocking over baby showers and stealing diaper bags from the playground, all for just one more wipe. 

So, by all means, try the Dollar Shave Club. Heck, try a sample of the Charlie's if they offer you one. FOR EMERGENCIES ONLY. But please, please don't make them a part of your life. It's gonna be the beginning of the end. For your end.

1 comment:

  1. And don't forget about the always clever and often funny Bathroom Minutes that arrives with each box of razors. It's always nice to have something to read to help pass the time when considering whether or not to use the Charlie's.