Wednesday, January 12, 2011

The Sandwich Scale

I think we are all a little tired of 1-10 scales, mostly because some doucher always says "I give it a 12" or something else that is 110% stupid. To avoid that unhappy state, anything reviewed on this site going forward will be ranked on the following scale. If you have trouble following along, well, just enjoy whatever sandwich you've been blessed with.

A Little Bit of Italy (Amighettti's) - The finest pure sandwich of all time.
Amighetti's Special - Second best sandwich in the world next to its teammate (from above). This top two would be like Lebron James and Dwyane Wade, except this sandwich actually is the second best one ever.
Cuban with Smoked Provolone - You can never have too much swine on one sandwich
Muffaleta - It's the olive spread, yo.
Pulled Pork – This is the middle of the road for Sandwiches. Dump enough BBQ sauce on this and it’s hard to screw up.
Roast Beef – Tends to make me just want pork
Reuben - A fine sandwich to be sure, but this sandwich has a propensity to over-promise and under-deliver
Cuban with Swiss - We just can't get down on holey cheese.
MLT – Mutton, Lettuce, & Tomato where the Mutton is cut nice & thin
Egg Salad - Some things just can't be untasted.


Please enjoy this list as a reference, as a window into our psyche, and as an appetite whetter.

14 comments:

  1. [...] This post was mentioned on Twitter by John Shepard, John Shepard. John Shepard said: New post for the #SFA. We have introduced the new standard in rating/ranking scales. #sandwichscale http://ow.ly/3CsUn [...]

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  2. [...] motivated enough to keep working out being reasonably good at the diet. Currently, on the official Padre Knows Best Sandwich Scale, I’ll give it a Cuban with smoked provolone, placing it well above average but with more [...]

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  3. [...] our Sandwich Scale I would rate the Garmin Forerunner 305 a Muffaleta. Which if you look at their product lineup in [...]

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  4. [...] In any event, these were obviously a bad buy on my part (fortunately, due to my charitable leanings I was able to find them a good home). Now what I need to do is find a comfortable pair of trainers that will give me a decent touch on the ball and isn’t really narrow. If anyone has any ideas, I’m all ears. In the meantime I need to give them puppies an MLT. [...]

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  5. [...] of either of these vendors, but I can report that their customer service is on the level of an egg salad sandwich that has been waiting very patiently only to be treated very [...]

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  6. [...] the Pants the rating of Amighetti’s Special (only because of the length issue) from our sandwich scale. This is a pretty impressive 1, 2 [...]

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  7. [...] giving this beer an Amighetti’s Special for two reasons: one, I have to leave a little room in case someone brews a beer that has a TV in [...]

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  8. [...] am giving the Bostonian Strata the highest award possible on our Sandwich Scale. The Amighetti’s Little Bit of [...]

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  9. [...] I love them each to death in their own special way. And I am giving them all our highest praise, a Little Bit of Italy rating.  Way to go, guys (and [...]

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  10. [...] scale is based on the deliciousness of sandwiches instead of a Thumb or Star. We simply call this The Sandwich Scale. We agreed upon this scale as a novel way to rate products and make our reading public hungry (or [...]

    ReplyDelete
  11. [...] want to give my mouth a shower after I eat one.   I’m giving the Power Sandwich a rating of MLT, only because it doesn’t have mayonnaise. GA_googleAddAttr("AdOpt", "1"); [...]

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  12. [...] when our kids don’t want to go to bed. So as a Dad, I am giving this book a Pulled Pork on the Sandwich Scale. Wait till it gets released to DVD or whatever the equivalent is in the book world and just spend [...]

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  13. [...] Final grades: The grill gets a Cuban with Smoked Provolone, those birds get a Cuban with Swiss, and the store experience gets a Reuben (the guy was a little weird, and they didn’t have the cover I wanted). [...]

    ReplyDelete